Though you may have talked and prepared, it is still natural to grieve when somebody dies and you are deprived of a direct relationship with them. Hopefully, though the grieving is less painful and more bearable and you can be more supportive of each other.
Everyone experiences grief in different ways. That is normal. For some rebuilding a life is a gradual climb. For others it is more like rolling waves with ups and downs.
Elisabeth Kübler-Ross developed a five stage model of the grieving process as a loose framework to describe a general process of grief of how a person might move through it.
Some people go through all these stages, others may not experience any. ‘Our grieving is as individual as our lives,’ Kübler-Ross said.
Common symptoms of grief can be:
- Shock and disbelief
- Physical symptoms (fatigue, nausea, weight fluctuation, insomnia, dry mouth, dizziness, breathlessness)
Remember that feelings of grief can start before a person dies. There is a loss of how things used to be and changes in the relationships.
Also, someone dying may feel a sense of grief before they die – the loss of their future and all that goes with it, for example important personal or family milestones.
Cruse is a charity that specialise in bereavement care and discusses in detail the issues surrounding different scenarios of grief and how to cope. They also offer support.